Michigan moves forward on marriage equality

The entire state of Michigan stood in tension during the first two weeks of March. The tension hung on the outcome of a trial and week-long deliberation regarding the constitutionality of the state ban on same-gender marriage. Two women, life partners who between them have adopted three children with disabilities, filed the suit. However, due to state law they are unable to adopt one another’s children. Initially they intended to overturn the ruling that prevented partner benefits for same-gender couples. That case failed. This case, to overturn the 2004 amendment against same-gender marriage, was stronger. Lawyers for the couple presented solid and compelling testimony that children who are raised in households with same-gender parents are just as healthy and capable as children raised by heterosexual couples.

During the trial, local news channels interviewed Christians who supported 2004 amendment to the state constitution (Article One section 25) defining marriage as between one man and one woman. In response a number of Christians (including clergy who support marriage equality) renewed their effort to make public appearances at the marches taking place outside the courthouse. The Rt. Rev. Wendell Gibbs, Jr., Bishop of the Diocese of Michigan, published a statement in the Detroit Free Press on March 19, 2014 which said: "I stand in support of marriage equality and pray that our justice system will work to break down the walls of segregation, promote the humanity of all and calm our irrational fears."

Voters in Michigan passed the 2004 referendum amending the constitution. Ten years later lawyers for the state argued that federal courts should not overturn a policy adopted by the public referendum. Rather, they said, Michigan voters should decide if change was needed. 

Anticipation mounted as the trial drew to an end. No one knew how the judge, appointed by Ronald Reagan, would rule. A week after the close of the trial, just after 5pm on Friday, March 21, U.S. District Judge Bernard Friedman published his decision in a thirty-one page document striking down the state of Michigan ban on same-gender marriage. Responding to the lawyers for the state, Judge Friedman ruled that state authority "cannot trump federal constitutional limitations."

Shortly thereafter, the bishops of the four dioceses in the state of Michigan issued a statement in support of the ruling:

"As Christians and leaders in the Episcopal Church, we applaud Judge Friedman's decision to overturn Michigan's ban on equal marriage as a step on the right side of history,"

As the case of DeBoer v. Snyder continues to work its way through our judicial system, it is our hope that future judges will continue to find that the denial of marriage to same-gender couples is a denial of human dignity and a denial of rights under the law. We look forward in hopeful anticipation to the day when we can recognize all faithful and covenant relationships between any two people regardless of sex, both within the Church and within our society."

Thanks be to God,

The Rt. Rev. Todd Ousley
Bishop - Episcopal Diocese of Eastern Michigan

The Rt. Rev. Wendell N. Gibbs, Jr.
Bishop, Episcopal Diocese of Michigan

The Rt. Rev. Rayford Ray
Bishop, Episcopal Diocese of Northern Michigan

The Rt. Rev. Whayne M. Hougland, Jr.
Bishop, Episcopal Diocese of Western Michigan

Bishop Gibbs has given permission for clergy in the Diocese of Michigan to use the 2012 General Convention approved liturgy "I Will Bless You and You Will Be a Blessing". While not marriage vows, this blessing is currently available to be used to bless committed same gendered relationships in the Diocese of Michigan. Clergy must notify the Bishop and receive the approval of the Vestry in order to use the liturgy.

Following Judge Friedman’s ruling county clerks in Michigan initially stated that they would begin issuing marriage licenses on Monday. However a few hours later four counties announced that they would open on Saturday, March 22 for a special issuing of licenses. The county clerks also decided to waive the normal three day waiting period between issuing the license and a wedding ceremony. Thus the first couples were married shortly after 8am on March 22. The county clerk offices remained open until 1pm. According to the New York Times, on Saturday, March 22, three hundred couples were reported to have been married among the four counties that issued licenses and performed ceremonies. Sadly, by the end of Saturday the sixth circuit court, responding to a request by the Michigan State’s Attorney, issued a stay until Wednesday (March 26) on all licenses and marriages for same gendered couples.

Nonetheless there is hope. The attorney for the couple that won the suit said that the judge’s thirty one page judgment was strong. Recent polls indicate that a majority of Michigan residents now support marriage equality. On March 28, Attorney General, Eric Holder released a statement saying in part, “I have determined that the same-sex marriages performed last Saturday in Michigan will be recognized by the federal government. These families will be eligible for all relevant federal benefits on the same terms as other same-sex marriages." Amazingly, in a week’s time it now seems possible that Michigan will become one more state to honor marriage rights for all people. Now we wait with the hope that marriage equality will become the law in Michigan and marriages can be fully honored and celebrated by all people.

The Rev. Terri C. Pilarski is the Rector of Christ Church: Dearborn in the Diocese of Michigan, and Co-Convenor of the Episcopal Women’s Caucus

Andy McQuery, Diocesan Organizer for Oregon, Steps Down to Pursue Call to Priesthood

Integrity is proud to announce that Andy McQuery, Diocesan Organizer for Oregon and convener of the Integrity Portland chapter since September, 2009, has been accepted by the Right Rev.  Michael Hanley as a postulant for holy orders and plans to attend Yale Divinity School in New Haven, Conn., in the fall to study for the priesthood.  He has therefore stepped down from his roles with Integrity, although he will continue to serve on the chapter board of directors in an advisory capacity for the next few months. 

Andy McQuery at the Integrity Portland
2014 St. Aelred's Day observance
PHOTO CREDIT: Charlene McCreight

"Just as we were beginning our chapter's renewal, Andy contacted me, asking to serve," said Integrity's Vice President for Local Affairs Matt Haines, who was at the time the Diocesan Organizer for Oregon.  "His humble, stalwart and faithful leadership has helped to create a culture of LGBTQ inclusion all over the diocese.  Well done!"

"Andy has played a role in Integrity events throughout the diocese of Oregon, participating in Portland, Eugene, Salem and Ashland Pride events and leading Believe Out Loud workshops in many churches," said chapter board member Charlene McCreight, who has been elected as the new Chapter Convener.  "His presence has been deeply felt and he will be greatly missed."

At his final Integrity event, Andy said, "Tonight has been grand and glorious, and I stand here with a heart bursting full of gratitude.  I look around this room and I see so many people who have become good, good friends; so many who have given abundantly of their time, talent and treasure in this shared work of justice and reconciliation. We have come so far and done so much, and I will carry you and many wonderful memories in my heart forever."

 Charlene McCreight is the Convener of Integrity Portland

Sorting Out Phelps

It’s been a few days since Fred Phelps died, and I still can’t sort out my feelings. I don’t know whether to throw a party and dance on his grave, thanking God for finally ridding us of that pernicious hate-monger or whether to cry with compassion for his family and sorrow that in this life he never saw the face of the God who is Love.

Students of Siena College counter a Westboro Baptist
Church demonstration in Albany, N.Y. on Mar.  6 2009
PHOTO CREDIT:  Sebastien Barre
Used under Creative Commons License

I can only imagine that his life was fuelled not by the living waters of grace, hope and forgiveness but by anger, resentment and fear and so he made a god in his own image - a god who hates fags. He represented the hatefully distorted face of Christianity to such an extreme that he made the average right-wing bigot look moderate. I am glad that he is gone and I hope that with his passing, his family church the Westboro Baptist Church will lose steam and go quietly into the night. But that which he represented is still among us. Hatred and prejudice have many faces. They are alive and well in the hearts of liberals as well as conservatives. They are alive and well wherever people feel misrepresented, overlooked and impotent as well as in places where people feel more powerful and better than the average Joe.

Forgiveness and gentleness are the marks of God’s people, which doesn’t mean that we need to be doormats, but that even as we resist the evil that enslaves us and our society, we do so with a peaceful, creative non-violent resistance that emulates the example of Christ. 

I hope that when Fred Phelps arrived at the pearly gates, St Peter met him dressed in drag and all the angels wore their best gender-bending outfits and waved rainbow flags. And I hope that even as he discovered that he was wrong and that God loves fags and queers, he also found that God loves very mis-guided Westboro Baptists too. And I hope that he found true repentance and finds a way, even from beyond the grave, to right some of the wrongs he perpetrated and perpetuated.

Back here on the earthly plane, it will not do our souls any good to harbor anger and resentment, so here is a blessing for Fred Phelps, taken from "For the Dying" by John O’Donahue.

May your spirit feel

the surge of true delight

when the veil of the visible

is raised, and you glimpse again

the living faces

of departed family and friends.

May there be some beautiful surprise 

waiting for you inside death,

something you never knew or felt,

which with one simple touch

absolves you of all loneliness and loss,

as you quicken within the embrace

for which your soul was eternally made.

May your heart be speechless

at the sight of the truth

of all your belief had hoped,

your heart breathless

in the light and lightness

where each and every thing

is at last its true self,

within that serene  belonging

that dwells beside us

on other side

of what we see.

The Rev. Dr. Caroline Hall is the President of Integrity, author of  A Thorn in the Flesh: How Gay Sexuality is Changing the Episcopal Church, and Priest-in-Charge at St. Benedict's: Los Osos in the Diocese of El Camino Real.

Bishop Singh Speaks Out on LGBT Rights

On Wednesday, Feb. 26th, the Right Rev. Prince Singh, Bishop of Rochester, sent the following letter to the Anglican churches in Uganda and North and South India:

Dear brothers and sisters in the Anglican Church of Uganda and the Churches in North and South India,

My name is Prince Singh and I serve as bishop of the Episcopal Diocese of Rochester, New York, a member of the larger Anglican Communion. I write you because the recent passing of anti-homosexuality legislation in Uganda weighs heavily on my heart. India, my country of birth, recently passed a similar bill criminalizing gay and lesbian people, deeming their lifestyle as a punishable crime. I write you because it is my moral obligation to express my deepest rue – that these children of God are being persecuted within my Anglican family. I implore you to stand with these children of God, now made even more vulnerable by this unjust bill that flies at the face of our common baptismal dignity.

Our hearts break for the people of Uganda. Why? In the United States, we have treated our gay and lesbian brothers and sisters in a similar manner in the past. At one stage to be gay was criminal here and we treated gay people with great prejudice, hatred and fear. These attitudes are still present in our own country, but more and more enlightened people are able to see that God made gay and lesbian people - just as God made me brown. We are learning of the damage we have inflicted on human beings by hateful attitudes. But just as damaging as the sin of persecution is that horrible sin of silence. We have heard story after story of the pain and deep wounding that we have caused gay and lesbian people simply by saying nothing. Worse still, we have abused Scripture to fuel hate!

We cannot go on hurting those we are called to love and protect. These are our children, our mothers, our fathers, our brothers and sisters.

We don’t have all the answers, but we want to build a world where all people are safe, protected and loved equitably. What country does not want this for its people? What kind of Church wants to be complicit in creating a community of people who are scapegoats, ready sacrifices to hatred and bigotry?

We plead with you, as fellow Christians, as people who are called to reveal the love and grace of God to please pay attention and speak up.

• Please protect those who are gay or work for gay rights.
• Please provide a genuine safe space to hear the real life and stories of the gay community. They are not what you have been led to believe.
• Please find ways as the Church to protect and advocate for those who are more vulnerable and marginal members of society. This includes not only gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people, but also women, the poor, the unemployed, the outcaste and the hopeless.

We will be praying for you as you engage these issues of responsible discipleship. Please uphold us in your prayers as we strive to do the same in our context. Please tell us how we can be mutually helpful in this process since we are all interconnected in the web of life.

Your fellow servant in Christ,
The Rt. Rev. Prince G. Singh
Bishop, Episcopal Diocese of Rochester, NY

Prayers for the Rev. Gwen Fry, Transgender Priest in Arkansas

Integrity USA and TransEpiscopal are sad to report that the Rev. Gwen Fry, who came out last weekend as a transgender woman, is no longer the Priest in Charge of Grace Episcopal Church in Pine Bluff, Arkansas. We stand behind her leadership, courage, and integrity during this time. We also recognize and applaud the support offered to her and to Grace Church by the Right Rev. Larry Benfield, Bishop of Arkansas.  

For those seeking background information on this situation, we commend you to read the statements both Bishop Benfield and Gwen have shared, which are on the Diocese of Arkansas web site.

The Episcopal Church is committed to the full incorporation and equality of transgender and gender nonconforming people. As Bishop Benfield noted in a local news article, at its 2012 General Convention the Episcopal Church passed resolution D019, which stated "that no one shall be denied rights, status or access to an equal place in the life, worship, and governance of the Episcopal Church" on the basis of gender identity and expression. It also passed resolution D002 which barred discrimination on the basis of gender identity and expression in access to the ordination process. As a church we have declared, as our former Presiding Bishop the Most Rev. Edmund Browning once said, that "there will be no outcasts."

In her initial announcement, Gwen  described "an amazing opportunity to learn, to grow, to seek out and find the risen Christ in one another in ways we might never have expected." We hope that the whole church will seize this chance to learn, to be vulnerable, to know one another more authentically, to deepen their membership in Christ’s body.

As our Church continues in the ongoing process of learning and exploring what it means to have transgender people in community and in leadership, Integrity is proud to offer a wide range of educational resources, including the short film Voices of Witness: Out of the Box.

Gwen's commitment to living honestly, to letting her light shine, to growing into her full stature as a member of Christ’s body stands as a beacon of inspiration to all of us as we seek and serve Christ in all people, loving our neighbors as ourselves.


This weekend, Transfiguration Sunday will be observed across The Episcopal Church. We will hear the story of how Jesus walked up a mountain and was gloriously transformed beside Moses and Elijah as three bewildered disciples looked on in amazement.  Only in Matthew’s gospel does Jesus bend down, touch them, and say, "get up, and do not be afraid."

This message could not be more timely today.  As we stand together on God’s holy mountain, may we be strengthened to walk together through the challenges that lie before us, confident that in the process we will be changed into Christ’s likeness "from glory to glory."

____

A Statement from the Rev. Gwen Fry

I would like to express my sincere and deepest thanks to all of my family, colleagues, and friends who have reached out in support of me, of my family, and of our respective parishes. Not all of life’s journeys are ones we expect to take. They can be both challenging and filled with wonder. On Sunday I began a journey of conversation and education, of vulnerability, of transition. Because gender transition is something with which many are unfamiliar, it is only natural that there are questions. There may be anxiety, and at times we may stumble. But we also have an amazing opportunity to learn, to grow, to seek out and find the risen Christ in one another in ways we might never have expected. To do this well, I would like to engage with a spirit of respect, patience, peace, and prayer. Everyone needs space and time to talk and listen, to make adjustments, to make mistakes and ask forgiveness, to trust in the communal power of our membership in the body of Christ. My prayer is that we actively cultivate trust, patience, and respect, that we might rediscover the peace of Christ. I invite us all to continue prayerfully walking together in faith.

Faithfully,
The Rev. Gwen Fry

An Open Letter to Gov. Jan Brewer On Senate Bill 1062

Dear Gov. Brewer,

I, like many in this country and across the world, am watching Arizona intently to see whether or not you choose to veto SB1062. This may seem like an issue that impacts only your state, but it truly has a global impact and I feel called to reach out to you.

To let you know where I am coming from, Governor Brewer, here is some background. I am a social

worker working with folks who are trying to get back on their feet and live as responsible and productive citizens. I do this work because, like you, I love this country and believe this country can be a better place. I also do this work because I am a Christian who takes her religious teachings seriously. On Sundays, I teach Church school, and talk with elementary schoolers about what it means to live as followers of Christ. I am in a loving relationship with a wonderful individual, who is working in poverty alleviation because, like you, she believes this country and this world can be better.

I come from a loving Christian family, like many Arizona families. At one point, though, I felt very far from Christ. You see, Governor Brewer, I am a lesbian in a loving relationship with another woman. There was a point where I wanted so much to be who it was God made me to be and I was so afraid that who I was was wrong. I was afraid I was wrong because laws around me said that people like me were threats to religion and Christ who had to be protected against. Because of these laws, I stayed quiet in pain for years. Fortunately, I have come to find a life and a life in Christ that embraces me for who I am and allows me to work on making this country better.

Governor Brewer, SB1062 will not benefit or protect your state. What it will do instead is make children feel that they are bad or wrong for being exactly who they were created to be. It will tell them that they are threats to be feared and legislated against. It will stifle wonderful children who could grow to better your state, this country, and this world. I speak from experience, as one of those children. I urge you to do what is right for Arizona, for kids who will grow up to love someone of the same gender, and for this country by vetoing SB1062.

Respectfully,

"Marie"

You too can contact Arizona Governor Jan Brewer and ask her, as a person of faith, to veto anti-LGBTQ bill SB1062. You can contact Governor Brewer through this link: http://www.azgovernor.gov/Contact.asp


Marie is an Episcopalian and a social worker from Massachusetts who is constantly being challenged by her faith and career to expand her notions of community. In her spare time, she can be found doing yoga, semi-successfully learning needle point, and dreaming about cat ownership.

PRESS RELEASE: Integrity Condemns New Anti-LGBT Law in Uganda

Integrity is shocked and saddened by the news that President Yoweri Museveni of Uganda has signed into law the draconian anti-homosexuality law that introduces long prison sentences for gays and lesbians and makes it a crime to fail to report someone you believe to be gay. This will increase anti-gay hatred and set in place a renewed witch-hunt in which many people will be hurt.

We call upon the Church of Uganda to take seriously its commitment to Lambeth 1998 Resolution 1.10 in which Anglican Communion bishops committed themselves "to listen to the experience of homosexual persons and… to assure them that they are loved by God and that all baptized, believing and faithful persons, regardless of sexual orientation, are full members of the Body of Christ." Such a commitment in a time like this will surely include providing places of sanctuary for those whose lives are threatened.

Our hearts go out to our LGBTQ sisters and brothers who this morning are living in fear of betrayal by friends, family and neighbors and of long-term imprisonment.

It is unfortunate that Uganda should choose this way, according to a government spokesperson, "to demonstrate Uganda’s independence in the face of Western pressure and provocation." Uganda’s symbolic independence is being won on the backs of one class of citizens and this will provoke fear and confusion among the very people Museveni is elected to serve.

Integrity hopes that President Obama will follow up on his comment that this could complicate US relations with Uganda and will seriously consider the reduction of US aid until Uganda can show a better record of human rights.

Segregation in the Guise of Religious Freedom

It seems to me that at the core of all the major world religions is the principle of compassion. Yet we humans have funny ways of showing that compassion to those with whom we disagree. Fundamentalists of every faith seem to turn away from the fundamental of compassion to its opposite, legalism and judgmentalism.  In this country we are seeing a marriage of both Catholicism and evangelicalism with right-wing politics, an unholy alliance which came into being in the 1970s and continues to be supported by right-wing political organizations fueled by fear of lesbian, gay and transgender inclusion. The newest manifestation of this is the proliferation of “Religious Freedom Restoration Acts” being introduced in state legislatures around the country.

These acts seem to be benign attempts to make sure that everyone has freedom of religion but in fact they are thinly disguised attacks on the LGBT community. The attempt in Kansas was quickly brought up short, but Arizona’s more draconian bill has made it through both House and Senate and will likely be signed into law by the governor in the next week.  This would allow anyone to use religious conscience as a reason to refuse service of any kind to anyone. (I encourage you to sign a petition asking the governor to veto it.)

Since 1976 The Episcopal Church has been committed to fighting discrimination against LGBT people, and we need to continue this work wherever discrimination surfaces.  The Very Rev Troy Mendez of Trinity Cathedral, Phoenix urges us to see this work in the context of Jesus’ call for us to be peacemakers in his statement issued jointly with the Right Rev Kirk Smith, Bishop of the Diocese of Arizona.

We LGBTQ folk, our loved ones, and allies have a right to be angry that these laws are being introduced apparently to promote freedom but actually to introduce a new form of apartheid. We are right to be angry about this concerted backlash against the increasing freedom we are enjoying federally and in some states. But if our anger fuels our hatred against those who are acting out of fear and ignorance, then they have won. If our anger leads us to turn away from involvement in public life, disengaging in disgust from a process that seeks to exclude us, then they have won.

Jesus gave us the supreme example of non-violent resistance. So, as his followers let us be fired by our anger to take action but action which continues to recognize that even those who seek to exclude us are also beloved of God.  Please take note of the bills being introduced to the legislature in your state and start working now to make sure that, as in Kansas, they are defeated by the pressure of public opinion.

Our work is not done until we have created a world where compassion underlies every action.

The Rev. Dr. Caroline Hall is the President of Integrity and author of A Thorn in the Flesh: How Gay Sexuality is Changing the Episcopal Church.

Progress, Diocese of Texas Style (Or How A High Strung Gender Non-conforming Radical Goes To Council)

In the Diocese of Texas, Canon 43 effectively prohibits partnered gay and lesbian priests from working
within our diocese. It does this by setting a "standard of abstinence from sexual relations outside of Holy Matrimony". In the next paragraph, Holy Matrimony is defined as the "physical and spiritual union of a man and a woman...and with intent that it be lifelong".

Photo by S. Wayne Mathis

Progressives have been trying to remove, replace or amend this canon annually for many years. Each attempt is met with strong opposition often ending with very strident floor fights during Diocesan Council.

This year, the more radical elements of the progressive wing of our diocese tried a different approach. A core group of dedicated folks (including many of the Integrity Houston Board), put together a grassroots movement to amend the canon. With the help of lawyers and theologians and with months of rewrites, we came up with a proposed amendment. We worked hard at tempering our language to achieve a very sane and rational amendment, surprising both our supporters and opponents alike. With a deadline looming, we gathered 103 cosponsors in about 10 days. Of this number, 98 were laity and 5 were clergy (2 active and 3 retired). After meeting the Canons and Constitutions Committee deadline, we continued to gather support for the amendment. A careful strategy was in place heading into council. The radicals (myself in particular) were to remain in the background and we would move forward in a calculated approach putting forth our best team players.

In a bold move, Bishop Andy Doyle addressed the issue of Canon 43 within the opening Bishop's address. In his address (which can be found at www.epicenter.org), he directly asked the sponsors that the amendment not be brought to the floor of council. He asked for the opportunity to address Canon 43 in a way similar to the way "Unity in Mission" (a program for same-sex blessings of lay LGBT couples) had been introduced. Under these circumstances, we decided that we simply must withdraw the amendment, honor his request, and allow him the opportunity he so clearly asked for. We felt to have done otherwise would have harmed our position. The withdrawal and its timing gained us favor throughout the diocese. We were able to keep our dignity and to establish the fact of being able and willing to work with the bishop's office.

While monitoring the progress of this issue, we stand ready to assist in educational efforts. At the same time, we are poised to take action again at the next diocesan council if we are needed.

Having always been part of the core of the amendment to 43 movement and ultimately the spokesperson at council, I would like to share my personal feelings.

1. This was grassroots at its finest. We would not take a "wait and see" approach, our traditional sources of support did not immediately back us up, and yet we kept marching forward. As council approached and the amendment gathered momentum, our long time allies again stood with us. Lines of communication with the Bishop were evident throughout the final days so that our efforts, our opponents' efforts, and even the Bishop's intentions did not come as a surprise to anyone. Transparency was our motto.

2. We were fighting for those who have no voice. In this and in many other dioceses, gay and lesbian clergy cannot fight for their own equality. If we do not speak up, then who will?

3. Even though the amendment was withdrawn, OUR efforts brought the issue to the table. It can now be addressed in a peaceful non-combative manner.

4. This was a TEAM effort, each of us had a role to play and none of us felt ALONE. Some folks worked on the legal aspects, others worked on the theological aspects. My role was to manage the final amendment, keep track of sponsors, and to co-lead the efforts at council. The team always had my back.

Photo by S. Wayne Mathis

5. At council (in my purple shoes of course), I found myself in the unique position of holding our "team" together. I felt honored and privileged to speak and to act on behalf of our side. I was treated with the utmost respect by Bishop Doyle, by Maria Boyce the chair of the Canons and Constitutional Committee, and also by the Chancellor David Harvin. Throughout the two day council, I was greeted with words of support and encouragement from longtime friends as well as dozens of folks that simply knew of me and the work that I was trying to accomplish.


6. I believe that I gained greater respect and acceptance as a leader within my own parish delegation as a result of being able to work directly with the bishop while holding fast to my core values. I instinctively knew when to push hard, when to hold back and when to compromise.

7. My LGBT activism within the church has often been an uphill battle with no end in sight. There were times, that I felt very isolated and without hope. Every time that I would want to give up and leave the church, God would always send someone or something that would hold me back and provide me strength to not give up. Integrity at all levels has often been that sustaining force. The local chapter allows me the opportunity to lead and to their credit they never cringe when I show up in drag for the pride parade or when I stand before them asking them for donations for a cause. National Integrity has also welcomed me into their fold first as a volunteer at General Convention and now as Provincial Coordinator and also as a member of the Stakeholders. I have met so many great people along the way and I hold each of you in my heart and you travel with me every step of the way. Likewise, my mama taught me to care about justice and equality long before I ever realized that I was gay. She too travels in my heart.

8. I hope that I can give back to the LGBT (and allies) community even a fraction of the love that I have received.

9. I thank God for allowing me the tenacity to carry on because I have seen the Light of Hope. If God can use a high strung gender non-conforming radical from a small parish of a small town in a very conservative state, then God can use anyone. I stand as a symbol of HOPE. Never give up on yourself or each other. There is LIGHT and there is HOPE.

Mr. S Wayne Mathis serves as the Provincial Coordinator of Province VII.

Church of England Takes Another Backwards Step

Archbishop Justin Welby

Photo by "Messiah Lutheran (Mechanicsville, VA)"

Used under Creative Commons License

The Church of England has an interesting system of alternating evangelicals and Catholics when appointing the Archbishop of Canterbury. It seems that they are adopting a similar system for the control of their (possibly) unruly LGBT members. The Pilling Report published at Thanksgiving offered some (small) hope that attitudes were shifting, with its recommendation that clergy could be allowed to offer a service to mark same-gender unions. This pleased liberals and annoyed conservatives. But just a day after St. Valentine’s Day, the Church of England House of Bishops made it quite clear that that’s not going to happen any time soon.

Responding to the fact that same-gender marriages will happen in the UK starting next month, they issued a pastoral statement saying once again that marriage is only for a man and a woman. Consequently, CofE clergy, already banned from performing such weddings, may not offer a service of any kind – merely "informal prayers." Not surprisingly, this is annoying liberals and pleasing conservatives.

It wouldn't all be quite so baffling if the same House of Bishops hadn't stated just last month, "We are united in welcoming and affirming the presence and ministry within the Church of gay and lesbian people, both lay and ordained. We are united in acknowledging the need for the Church to repent for the homophobic attitudes it has sometimes failed to rebuke and affirming the need to stand firmly against homophobia wherever and whenever it is to be found."

Why then, do this pastoral statement and its accompanying guidelines make it very clear that gay Anglican clergy may not marry and married gay people need not apply to become clergy?

"Marriage" is socially defined. A quick survey of the history of marriage shows that it has meant different things at different times and in different places. The only difference the CofE seems to make between civil partnerships (which it allows for gay clergy) and marriage (which is reserved for heterosexuals) is gender. Is banning people from being able to live their lives fully and joyfully just because of gender "standing firmly against homophobia?” I don’t think so.

The fact that the statement was sent to bishops and archbishops throughout the Anglican Communion makes it seem as though this statement had a particular audience. Whereas the Pilling Report, which seemed to open the door of equality just a chink, was directed at the Church of England, this missive was directed at the Anglican Communion. Just as the Most Rev. Rowan Williams found it politically necessary shortly after his appointment to declare Lambeth 1.10 the "standard of teaching” of the Anglican Communion, thus promulgating the notion that homosexual activity is incompatible with Scripture, so now the Most Rev. Justin Welby may be finding it necessary to show that he’s not going "soft” on gay marriage.

The day before the statement was published, he told the General Synod of the CofE "There is great fear among some, here and round the world, that [special services for gay couples] will lead to the betrayal of our traditions, to the denial of the authority of scripture, to apostasy, not to use too strong a word,”… "And there is also a great fear that our decisions will lead us to the rejection of LGBT people, to irrelevance in a changing society, to behaviour that many see akin to racism."

It seems that once again the Archbishop of Canterbury is choosing to bow to those Anglicans who insist on a traditionalist view of Christian teaching rather than daring to boldly re-interpreting God’s grace for contemporary times.

My heart goes out to those in England who will pay the price.

The Rev. Dr. Caroline Hall is the President of Integrity and author of A Thorn in the Flesh: How Gay Sexuality is Changing the Episcopal Church.

On Valentine's Day, Not Everybody's Dancing

LGBT Christians have had much to celebrate recently... the number of states providing legal marriage quality has pretty much doubled, and other countries have followed suit.  About two-thirds of the domestic dioceses of our church are using -- in some fashion -- the official rite for blessing same-gender relationships that was adopted by resolution at the 2012 General Convention.

"Looking for Love" by Alan Cleaver
Used under Creative Commons License

But as our culture holds up all things romantic and our welcoming congregations greet happy LGBT couples with open arms, it is important to remember that not everybody has a partner, and not everybody is celebrating. Single LGBT people have their own pastoral needs, particularly because their secular lives can be a bit of a battleground.

I wrote recently in my personal blog about how smart-phone apps have turned gay male dating into a GPS-powered scavenger hunt where a stamp-sized photo and the right set of acronyms are your only tools. Those who don't resemble the airbrushed images that saturate gay-targeted media find themselves at a disadvantage where the self-appointed top of the hierarchy are young, muscular, Caucasian and (distressingly) "straight-acting". Among the rest of us is a self-defeating tendency to idolize that which we are not, and our desirability is dependent on the degree to which we can "pass".

For a whole lot of reasons, our folks are statistically more likely to be unemployed, homeless, addicted and depressed, not because there is something inherently wrong with them; we just frequently have a tougher row to hoe, and it takes a toll.  As we know, the church traditionally bears some responsibility for this collateral damage, and thus we need to have a role in healing as well.  Even those who are coping nicely, thank you, would appreciate to be intentionally and specifically included in your programs and prayers.

As your congregation reviews its wedding customary to include same-gender couples and makes plans to observe Pride, please be mindful to include the whole LGBT community, not just those with shiny new rings.

Christian Paolino is the Chair of Integrity's Stakeholders' Council and Diocesan Organizer for Newark.

Federal Rulings on Marriage in Kentucky, Virginia

LGBT Virginians woke up to some positive news this Valentine's Day. A federal judge ruled on Thursday that the commonwealth's constitutional amendment banning same-gender marriage is at odds with the U.S. constitution, and that Virginia must recognize such marriages conducted in other states.  The decision by the Hon. Arenda L. Wright Allen of the United States District Court for the Eastern District of Virginia, in Norfolk, was immediately appealed by marriage equality opponents, and Judge Allen stayed her ruling while the case is heard by the United States Court of Appeals for the Fourth Circuit in Richmond.  By advancing the case to a higher court, the stakes are also raised: a Fourth Circuit ruling could also affect similar bans in the Carolinas and West Virginia.  Maryland and Washington DC, which are also part of the Fourth Circuit, already have marriage equality.

"Our Constitution declares that 'all men' are created equal," wrote Judge Allen in her decision. "Surely this means all of us."

Susan Pederson
Integrity Province III Coordinator

The news was welcomed by Integrity's Province III Coordinator Susan Pederson, who lives in the Norfolk area.  "I am guardedly optimistic that eventually equal rights will soon prevail in Virginia. While the ban on same sex marriages has been declared unconstitutional, the judge also stayed her decision while the Appeals process plays out. Tradition is not sufficient to deny a group of people equal rights protected under the 14th amendment. Just as it was unconstitutional to deny the plaintiffs in Loving v. Virginia the right to marry based solely on the colors of their skin, I believe that Virginia's ban on same sex marriage will also fall and we can finally say Virginia is for ALL lovers."

Earlier this week in Kentucky, another federal judge ruled that that state must recognize same-gender marriages legally performed in other states.  That decision, by the Hon. John G. Heyburn II, extended the legal benefits of marriage to same-gender couples married elsewhere, but did not address the existing ban on such unions within the Commonwealth of Kentucky.  He wrote that "For years, many states had a tradition of segregation and even articulated reasons why it created a better, more stable society. In time, even the most strident supporters of these views understood that they could not enforce their particular moral views to the detriment of another’s constitutional rights. Here as well, sometime in the not too distant future, the same understanding will come to pass."

New challenges to existing bans on marriage quality were also filed in Missouri and Louisiana, and a federal judge in Texas conducted a hearing as part of an ongoing suit.

Kansas Steps Backward, Bishops Cry Foul

As LGBT rights inch forwards around the country and many same-gender couples are finally able to dance at their own weddings, Kansas's step of choice for Valentine's Day week was a regressive moon-walk:

Kansas State Capitol
By Jim Emerson
Used by Creative Commons License

By a vote of 72-49, the Kansas House of Representatives empowered individuals, businesses and religious groups to refuse service to same-gender couples with impunity, if doing so would be "contrary to the sincerely held religious beliefs of the individual or religious entity regarding sex or gender."  The bill, which now moves to the senate, mentions not only retail business, but services such as adoption and counseling, as well as employment.  State employees are specifically protected by its language.

Interestingly, the measure does not specify whether one's objections need be "pro"or "con": theoretically, one can now choose to only employ or wait on LGBT people if called to do by one's faith.  It also does not specify by what means one is to determine the sexual orientation or gender identity of those against which one proposes to discriminate.

Kansas's two diocesan bishops issued a strongly-worded statement Friday that was sent to every member of the state Senate:

"This proposed legislation is reminiscent of the worst laws that permitted discrimination against people on the basis of color, sex or nation of origin. The intent of this bill is an affront to the beliefs of all Kansans who support equal treatment under the law for every human being," wrote the Right Rev. Dean E. Wolfe, Bishop of Kansas, and the Right Rev. Michael P. Milliken, Bishop of Western Kansas. "Kansas history is filled with examples of standing up for the expansion of rights – in our abolitionist, free state roots; as the first state in the country to elect a woman to a political office; and as a place identified with contributing to the end of school desegregation. We have a high calling to provide equality and equal opportunity to everyone."

 The bishops were quick to emphasize how their stance is in line with our church's core values:  "For Episcopalians, our faith is unequivocal. Our Baptismal Covenant asks, 'Will you seek and serve Christ in all persons, loving your neighbor as yourself? Will you strive for justice and peace among all people and respect the dignity of every human being?' Promising to strive for justice and peace among all people and to respect the dignity of every human being requires us to be adamantly opposed to legislation that does none of these things," they wrote.  "Our biblically-based faith calls us to live out the command of Jesus Christ to love one another. You cannot love your fellow Kansans and deny them the rights that belong to everyone else."

Integrity's Kansas City chapter members were grateful for the support of their bishops.  "The acts of the Kansas legislature do not reflect the state of the Episcopal Church in Kansas. We will continue to stand for the dignity of every human being," stated Larry Bingham. "Eventually, 'we shall overcome'. Reason will prevail and recent advances in LGBT acceptance in the U. S. secular culture give me hope that the political value of this kind of hatred will be short-lived."

And, in the wake of widespread criticism of the bill, the Senate president Susan Wagle told the press that the majority of her colleagues will not vote for the bill. 

"Seeing a response such as our bishops gave is truly beautiful, a lift to the spirits of LGBT persons and our straight allies," said chapter convener Scott Schaefer.  "The fact that this bill gained any traction at all has refueled my purpose however, and hopefully motivated our spirits to remain active in sharing God's love to LGBT persons living in Kansas... to all people. 

"With the leadership of these bishops, we surely hear a call to ministry: sharing theology in a way that motivates love and diminishes fear, encourages a brave faith instead of exclusionary practices."

Christian Paolino is the Chair of Integrity's Stakeholders' Council and the Diocesan Organizer for Newark

Ann Turner Named Diocesan Organizer for Southern Virginia

Ann Turner

Integrity is pleased to announce the appointment of Ann Turner as Diocesan Organizer for the Diocese of Southern Virginia.

Ann is a life-long Episcopalian and serves as the Communications Officer for the Diocese of Southern Virginia, a position to which she was called by her bishop in 2010. Prior to that, she served as the Communications Director at Eastern Shore Chapel Episcopal Church in Virginia Beach for ten years.

"Ann is one of the hardest working folks I know," enthused Susan Pederson, Integrity's Province III Coordinator. "She has her fingers on the pulse of the Diocese and I am honored to welcome her and work alongside her! She has been instrumental in the success of the Integrity Virginia Beach Chapter." Province III of the Episcopal Church consists of thirteen dioceses in mid-Atlantic states from Virginia to Pennsylvania.

While at Eastern Shore Chapel, Ann co-founded the Integrity Virginia Beach Chapter. She has a degree in English from the College of William & Mary and has spent most of her career in the non-profit sector, working for a variety of agencies, including welfare-to-work, environmental education, and healthcare. Ann lives in Virginia Beach, is an avid runner, and enjoys hiking with her two dogs.

"We are blessed to have someone with Ann's vast experience taking on this important leadership ministry," said Matt Haines, Integrity's Vice President for Local Affairs, who supports the team of provincial and diocesan leaders.  "She has already been part of a dynamic chapter in Southern Virginia and will be part of a great team in Province III." 

Integrity Diocesan Organizers serve as a liaison between bishops and their staffs and the Integrity leadership, and also work to encourage congregations and individuals to get involved with our programs.  Together with our eight Provincial Coordinators, they plan workshops and other educational opportunities around the country.  We are actively seeking candidates to fill this important role in more areas.  Please contact us for more information.

St. Aelred's Day Homily

The following homily was offered by Province IV Coordinator Bruce Garner on Saturday, January 11 as Integrity Palm Beach observed the Feast of St. Aelred at St. Andrew's: Lake Worth.

The Feast of St. Aelred, Abbot of Rievaulx

• Psalm 36:5-10
• Ruth 1:15-18
• Philippians 2:1-4 
• Mark 12:28-34a

We have heard the words of the readings for this evening many many times.

Integrity Province IV Coordinator Bruce
Garner with Exec. Director Vivian Taylorat Atlanta Pride in 2013

The reading from Ruth is read at countless weddings ….and of course now for the blessing of same gender relationships as well. Despite whatever baggage these words may have collected over the years, the message is still very clear: commitment… commitment to someone you love and who presumably loves you. They are the hallmark words of devotion to another with whom one has some form of relationship.

Holy Women, Holy Men has added a reading from Philippians, the closing words from the Philippians passage sum up the directions that precede them: Look not to your own interests but to the interests of others….again with those with whom there is a relationship.

Then we hear the familiar words in Mark about the two great commandments we have been given……both grounded in love…..unconditional love. "'Hear O Israel! The Lord our God is one; you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.' The second is this, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.'"

We highlight the importance of this passage by including part of it in our General Confession as we confess that "we have not loved you with our whole heart; we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves."

This passage poses the second "trick question" to Jesus found in this chapter of Mark’s Gospel. The previous trick question was posed by some of the Sadducees a few verses earlier.

It asks whose wife a woman would be in the resurrection after she had married and survived the deaths of seven brothers, being passed as property to each in succession.

Jesus condemns the Sadducees for their hypocrisy in asking a question about a concept in which they had no belief, i.e., resurrection. And of course he is clear in telling them how wrong they are.

Window at St. Andrew's Church, Lake Worth
home parish of Integrity Palm Beach
PHOTO CREDIT: Christian Paolino

So now the Pharisees are trying to trick Jesus again. They are looking for a way around something clearly already know. They want Jesus to say something for which they can condemn him. They are looking for a "gotcha moment." They do not get their "gotcha moment."

They immediately realize that Jesus has provided an absolutely correct response to their question, a response that is familiar to all of them.

What do these readings say to us? Do they speak differently to those of us who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender….LGBT…..the sexual orientation alphabet!

Are we as clear as Jesus in understanding that there are no exceptions or qualifications to loving God or loving our neighbor?

Our love of God, perhaps even our faith is put to the test when we find ourselves facing someone who is completely and totally not lovable from any reasonable perspective we can discern. Yet we are called to love and love without exception or qualification. We are called to love as we have been loved and as we are loved:. God hates nothing that God has made. God IS love.

As my rector is constantly reminding us: We are made by love for love. For God is love….and so we have been created… by love for love.

We may not be so good at following a portion of that Scriptural passage cited by Jesus: It’s the portion about loving ourselves. That’s the condition and the caveat by which we are to love others: as we love ourselves. The question is: Do we really love ourselves?

For most who choose to follow Jesus, loving themselves is probably not all that big an issue. But what about us? What about those of us, who because of sexual orientation and/or gender identity, have heard a constant message about how UN-lovable we are?

How can we love our neighbor or even God when we have problems loving ourselves…..loving the creature that God made?

We live in a part of the United States and a province of the Episcopal Church where we are probably more likely to hear about how un-lovable we are to both God and other people. That atmosphere has an impact on us. It may be subtle. It may be blatant. We might not even realize how it affects us. We do allow many of the negative messages we hear about LGBT people to enter our consciousness and our sub-consciousness. We believe more of the trash talk than most of us realize or are willing to admit.

Some of the responsibility for the ongoing negative messages rests upon those of us who are LGBT. That is in no way a statement that we deserve such treatment or that others should be allowed to treat us differently.

Let’s look at this from a different perspective. Who knows that you are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender? How "out" are you to your family, friends, and most importantly your faith community.

In that light: How many folks would make negative comments about someone’s sexual orientation if they realized that someone in their immediate circle was one of those they treated less than a full and equal child of God? We are not marked in some way to identify our sexual orientation. A person of color usually cannot hide her/his race or ethnicity. An LGBT person can hide in plain sight. How often have we made disparaging remarks about some person or group not realizing that one of "them" was standing among us?

Several years ago during my working career, I engaged in the design, built out and inspection process of offices for the Social Security Administration. I was involved in space planning, layout, design and lease administration.

I had been on the site of a large project, here in Florida actually, for an entire week. During an informal conversation with several of the construction trades and the property owner, that same property owner told a fag joke…with me standing there. I didn’t say anything at the time, trying to be as consummate a professional as I could be. At the closing inspection when just the two of us were there, I quietly looked at him and said: The next time you tell a fag joke in a group of people, you might want to make sure there isn’t a fag standing there. After nearly choking, he looked at me and acknowledged that he had seen fire flash in my eyes when he had told the joke. He knew he had crossed a line. I wasn’t nasty or rude to the man, but I did use the event as a teaching moment. Being able to pass for straight does have its advantages. Educational opportunities come about for us all the time if we choose to use them. Of course it was also helpful for me to stand a head taller than the dude and out weigh him by some 30 pounds! Being a big old faggot sometimes has advantages!!

How much hiding in plain sight do we do in our own faith communities? How much in church?

We have learned over the years that the conversations and the interactions change dramatically when those who share our faith community begin to understand that there really are a substantial number of LGBT folks who love God and worship God the same way as those who are not LGBT. It becomes more difficult to make an issue out of someone we have come to know and love. It becomes more difficult to really want to deny the fullness of our church to those who we see engaging with God the same way we engage with God: through prayer and worship.

It takes courage to be out about who we are as LGBT people, even, if not particularly so in the church. It is not an easy path to walk. I know, I have been there.

From 1993 until about 2009, I found myself as the only openly gay deputy or alternate deputy to General Convention in all 20 dioceses that make up Province IV of our church. Note that I didn’t say I was the only gay person.

I was the only openly gay person. I knew others….and I kept their confidences….including some closeted clergy.

I lost count of the number of times that something about sexual orientation was being discussed at Provincial Synod and I began to hear the usual negative comments about LGBT folks, mostly very inaccurate comments, many ignorant comments and many that were painful to hear.

I began to notice a change in the tenor of the conversations when I quietly walked up to a microphone and gently requested that folks talk with and to me and other LGBT folks and not talk about us……as if we were not present during these conversations. Each time I did that, it was like coming out all over again. There was some degree of nervousness and uncertainty.

But each time it became easier than the last. And each time it proved more than worth the anxiety. It was a rare occasion that I didn’t feel a tremendous amount of love and care after having spoken. I don’t know that my comments always made a difference in the outcome of a vote. I do know that my open presence and honesty about who I was as a child of the living God did change the conversations.

Remember something very important if you remember nothing else: It is much more difficult to demean or dismiss a human face than it is to demean or dismiss an issue. When the issue has a face, the conversation changes. My own personal ministry for many years has been to put the face on the faggot. For when the faggot has a face, he is no longer the faggot, he is the child of God he always was.

Some may not like the terminology, but I believe it is important to name that which causes pain and discrimination or we will never see it end. Such has always been true of any marginalized group of people. No one sitting here this evening is an issue. Each and every one of us is a remarkable child of God, created in God’s image and reflective of the love that God has for all God has created.

The success of ministry with, by and to the LGBT community and conversely the church is a direct result of being open and honest about who we are…..and dealing with the cost and consequences. That is not to say that everyone must be as open as everyone else. I live in a real world. For some of us it is still not safe for us to be who we are. But let me also tell you that the liberation that comes from being open is truly a gift from God! The truth is that LGBT folks have always been part of the church. There is a simple but profound joy that comes from realizing just how much of an extent we have always been there.

The ministry of St. Aelred gave us all a gift. He gave us, through his instructions to his monks, the gift of sharing affection. He encouraged his monks to do something as simple as holding hands, as expressing affection for each other. No where do we find anything suggesting a sexual component in his teachings. We just find something we have allowed to diminish in our society and church: simple affection for each other, affection without further intent or any inappropriate component.

Think about something very simple that we do in church at most of our services: We exchange the peace of Christ with each other. We have the image and model of heterosexual couples engaging in a hug and often a kiss during the exchange of the peace.

What do those of us who are lesbian or gay instinctively do or not do as same gender couples? Do we model the same level of affection and care for each other as those heterosexual couples? Or do we nod, maybe shake hands, or engage in the briefest of hugs. Certainly no one wants to see, nor is it appropriate for those public displays of affection that go too far. But why would we find a need to deny ourselves the same basic and ordinary displays of affection at such an important time as others take for granted?


Now I realize that exchanging the peace remains a moment of truth for many Episcopalians…..it means we actually have to acknowledge that someone else is in church with us, much less in the pew next to us! Some of us are still the frozen chosen and it has nothing to do with sexual orientation…..or on the other hand maybe it has more to do with that than we might think.

We have also been given another wonderful and precious gift in the Episcopal Church. Do we realize that? Do we share what we have been given?

Think back to the first commandment for a moment. Loving God with our heart and soul and strength is probably not all that difficult or even remarkable. But what about loving God with our minds? What about the idea of actually thinking about God and how we relate to God? How often do we hear even a suggestion in many faith communities that people worship God with their minds?

We, as Episcopalians, are constantly asked to worship God with our minds. We are challenged to engage with God in a substantive way, working out our salvation with the one who created us. Have you ever pondered what a gift it is to be allowed, to be asked, to be encouraged to worship God with your mind?

It has been by worshiping God with our minds that we have come to conclusions about how we should relate to each other….regardless of how alike or different we are.

There is a hurting world outside the walls of our churches. It is a world filled with folks who desperately need to hear that God loves them and that the people of God love them. We have traveled a difficult journey over the last few decades in helping us believe and practice what our Book of Common Prayer reminds us about the need to love God and to love our neighbors. If we do not share what we have learned with others, we have lighted the lamp and then put it under the proverbial bushel basket.

We, as a church, are not particularly good at evangelism. No real news there for any of us! The term scares many of us….often because of some of our past history in other church communities. In reality, we just need to learn to share the good news we have received with others. We need to invite others to join us in a remarkable and fulfilling journey with the God of love who created us for love. It is a journey all make at some point in life and we can offer a route that may not be expected…..especially about worshiping God with or mind.

A gift gains greater value when it is shared with others. Are we willing to share? Do the signs proclaiming "The Episcopal Church Welcomes You" just spout a tired old slogan? Or do we really welcome all without restriction, exception, qualification or other criteria? Is it only a saying or do we really mean it?

Hear O Israel, Hear St. Andrews, and Hear Integrity Palm Beach: Love the lord our God with all that we are and love our neighbor as we love ourselves. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets…..at least that is what Jesus told us…..should we argue the point? Probably not. So let the people now say Amen!

Bruce Garner is the Province IV Coordinator for Integrity USA and served as its president from 1990-1994.  He also has served as a deputy to General Convention and as a member of the Executive Council of the church.